Calibrate

 Salam. 

The new norm that I am in now is so humbling. Yesterday, I did keep in touch with two of my close friends via separate call. They called me because they were worried about me and we haven’t keep in touch for a while, since my father had his operation.

Our father are all in their prime 60s. They were both crying listening to my details, which I initially were not because I am sort of done with the waterworks since last 3 weeks. But thing is, crying is a contagious act for me I really can’t see other people crying without me joining the party too, so in between the sobs we had our life updates. 

I am one sensitive soul despite the straight face I masked myself with, having friends and family who cared for me is humbling and touching. Maybe I am too long deprived from sad event, I really am humbled with the fact that they cried listening to me. I even cried writing this. Such a RAM (Queen of Tears AKA Ratu Air Mata). 

My father being unwell is one thing, but another bigger thing I observed during this plight are love and care surrounding my family and me. From my siblings, my mother’s family, from my friends, my colleague and even from new people that we got to know from our long stay in the hospital. Indeed Allah never leave us alone. He equipped us with the necessary tools & medium to brave the test. Alhamdulillah. 

Another thing I want to pen is the shifted life focus of mine after this event. It was almost abrupt that things that bother me so much before, is no longer lingered freely on my mind. I am still working, still will do my best but work is no longer everything. Apparently the phrase ‘work can wait’ resonated with me at the grander scale at the moment and I would like to add ‘work can wait but death is not’. Seeing my father so sick and weak make me realize that the fancy things I used to adore is sort of useless, why did I spend so much of my resources i.e time, energy, money there. 

Indeed, everyone is struggling, differently.

Hope everyone is well and blesssed with good health. Amin YRA.